My whole life I have felt fat. I was never the biggest in the school but I was always the biggest in my group, in 4 different schools. I never felt good enough. I never felt comfortable wearing the same kind of clothes they would wear even though I liked them. I always wanted to wear big baggy clothes. Occasionally I would wear a tight fitting top but never tight jeans. I always had a smaller upper body and then huge thighs.
I remember how I felt about myself so vividly. So when I was looking through some old pictures yesterday and saw myself, even beside my skinny friends, I couldn't believe the first thought that came to my head, "OMG I was so thin!" I could see my collar bone sticking out, my stomach was flat and although my thighs were a bit big they offered me a nice shape and I did not look fat.
I wish I enjoyed the years my body was like that. I wish I didn't waste them thinking I wasn't good enough. I cannot wait to look like that again. In fact I think I will tape those pics all over my treadmill so I can be reminded every day how beautiful I can be if I just stick to this.
I so understand this one. I always hated being the "fat" kid - but looking back now, I wasn't fat at all. It's amazing how our thought process changes. I think it's a great idea to post the pics on your treadmill...great motivation tool right there.
ReplyDeleteI remember that as well...thinking I was overweight in high school...ha! I wish I was so overweight now. Great realization for you and good motivation. Love yourself today.
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