Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Day 91 of 730 (Unbalanced)

Wow it is day 91 today. However since day 70 I haven't been doing so well. I have become so focused on school and completely neglecting my weight loss goals. I have been avoiding this blog because admitting failure is difficult. It was fun checking in every day with positive energy and positive results. saying "hey look at me not doing anything" doesn't have quite the same ring to it.

There is nothing to blame it on except for my own lack of will power and dedication. Laziness has been having it's way with me. I gave all of myself to school and use that as an excuse to not workout anymore. The truth is I have plenty of time to get some workouts in.

A workout after a few days off is harder to get through and so I dread getting back on the treadmill. I need to get back on track though. I did weigh myself today to see if I have completely gone back the wrong direction and I have not so there is still hope. I need to get back to 4 days a week.

I need to not quit...not give up...not fail.

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Day 70 (Feeling Good)

Well today I did my workout and now I feel great. I am reminded how good I was feeling when I was working out regularly. Completing a hard workout also makes me want to eat well even more. I just have to stick to plan and keep making it important.

I also have to remember that when I slip off track a little it isn't over. It's easy to get back on track.

Monday, September 20, 2010

Day 67-69 (Week In Review)

Let's see, where do I start? Well I did not stick to workout plan at all. The last day I did workout was Tuesday. I need to make this week better but it is getting very hard.

I am still coughing a lot which isn't helping. I am not sleeping well and am finding myself dragging during the day.

I was eating quite well until yesterday when I caught a case of the munchies. I am getting my eating back on track today though. I will work out Tomorrow for sure and hopefully get my groove back.

I do not like the feeling of slipping off the track. I need to get focused again and not let my efforts get lost in school work.

Weigh in day is coming up in 11 days. I need to see results!

Friday, September 17, 2010

Day64-66 (Finding it Difficult)

I don't know if it's the cold that refuses to leave my body, the stress from college, or simply that I'm losing interest but I am finding it very difficult to stay on track with this blog, working out and in some cases eating right.

It is like a trickling effect; I work out less, think about my habits less and thus lose interest in writing about it. I am not eating particularly bad, in fact I think that is one area that is pretty much on track. I just wish I could work out more consistently like I was this summer.

I think I will be setting a few new goals. After being in school for 2 weeks I am starting to realize that I can do it all (run my business, school, family) but I can't do it all well. So I have to find a new balance. What I have done is started limiting the number of parties I will accept on a weekend to increase the time I have for studying. I try to work on information gathering, organizing etc weekdays and I want to actually write big assignments on the weekends.

With my new schedule I want to move the days I will try to work out to be Saturday, Sunday, Tuesday and Thursday. I just don't know when I will be back on track with it because every other day I wake up feeling really congested and find it hard to get my cardio in. If this cold isn't gone by Monday I will get in to a doctor and see what's up.

Please stay with me as I am not giving up, I am just struggling to find a workable balance.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Day 59-63 (I'm Back)

Oh there is just no excuse for this slacking. I am so sorry for taking such a break from this blog. Some days I have simply forgotten, and others I just couldn't find the energy. I am still fighting off this nasty cold that my son has since picked up.

I am off the blogging track but still doing pretty well otherwise. Making healthy choices has never been easier. I find myself not snacking much at all anymore in the evenings. I haven't ate anywhere like McDonald's, Wendy's, KFC etc. When eating out we stick to the healthier options like Mr.Sub or Extreme Pita.

My working out is not where I'd like it to be and my goal is to get back to a more firm schedule. In part it's because I am not feeling well but it's also adjusting to my new schedule. I will be working out today but I didn't make the effort to do so yesterday. I am using this week to feel out school and re-evaluate my original ideas about the best time to workout. I will implement any changes for next week. I really just want 4 days a week in somewhat of a balance.

I am liking school a lot more now. I feel more like myself and more secure with the concept of what college is and what it isn't. I've met some great people and one girl in particular who wants to use the school's athletic center with me. I hope to implement that into my routine soon. She even said we could do yoga classes together.

Other than that, I promise to try to check back in daily like I am supposed to. I miss you all :)

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Day 57 and 58 (Sick)

Well it happened... second day of school and I start feeling a cold coming on. Sure enough today I am here with a full on cold; coughing, sneezing, sore throat, watery eyes, stuffy nose. The works!

I didn't do my planned workout after school today because I could hardly breath and didn't think I'd get through a workout without fainting. So I guess I took a sick day. I will try to work out tomorrow if I feel any better, otherwise I will just do it Saturday and Sunday.

My eating has been fine and I have been good about bringing a lunch and snacks. I'm still on track and as focused as ever in many areas of my life.

I am currently sipping on some neo citron and then I'll have some meds and cover myself in vicks in an effort to shake off this cold. I guess I've been isolated at home for too long and my immune system just cant fight off the germs of fellow classmates like they used to.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Day 56 of 730 (First Day)

Today was my official first class. I have to say I feel a little better. I know I will feel better in a few weeks. I did do my workout as planned this morning before class. That in itself was such a great feeling.

I have a lot to do so I cannot post much but wanted to say hello and let everyone know that I am sticking to plan. I promise to post something of substance as much as possible.

I love all my readers so thank you for every comment. They really make me smile and keep me going.

Monday, September 6, 2010

Day 54 and 55 (Nervous Eating)

This past week has been somewhat of a roller coaster ride for me emotionally. One minute all is fun and fine and the next I am a nervous wreck. Yesterday we were at my dad's house visiting for a bbq lunch when randomly for no reason I just had to be home and because we could leave the second I started to feel an anxiety attack coming on. It was a very quiet hour long drive home.

Once we got home my husband was being unusually patient with me and my mood slowly changed to being more relaxed. However I then found myself munching on cheese and crackers. When they were done it was popcorn. When that was done it was chocolate. Finally I went to bed because I felt I was trying to eat because I was nervous and not because I was actually hungry.

This morning I feel like I cant even eat. It's almost like the reverse of nervous eating... now I am too nervous to eat. Tomorrow is the first day of school. The first day of my family's new routine. I feel bad that dinner will not be on the table for them when they get home. I feel bad that my kids will have longer school days because they will need before and after school care. I wonder if I made the right choice.

I guess deep down I know it's the right choice for me and my family in the long run, but today it just feels so scary.

Saturday, September 4, 2010

Day 53 of 730 (Back to Work)

I've been slacking on my work outs this week as I have previously confessed. Today is the day I said I would get back to business. I am going to get my workout in from today until Tuesday. Wednesday is my busy day at school and I will not work out Wednesday's. Looking at my school schedule my workout plan is Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, Friday and when possible either Saturday or Sunday as well.

I might take some advice from a fellow tweeter and try increasing my intensity rather than duration of my cardio workout. I like the idea of doing 35minutes regularly but on busy days settling for a 25minute workout with a higher incline or something. I will see how September goes as I know there will be so much to adjust too.

On a side note, I have been having trouble sleeping the last few days because my brain will not stop thinking. I cannot wait to have my first week of school over with so my nerves can settle down. For now I hope exercise will help a little.

Friday, September 3, 2010

Day 52 of 730 (Emotional Mess)

Since my college orientation day yesterday I have been kinda up and down. One minute I feel motivated and ready to go and the next thing I know I am a scared shitless mess. The thing is my life is changing very quickly in just a few days and I feel like it's all so uncertain.

Everything seems to be going wrong too. For example I have been trying to get my new laptop for school for at least a month from my dad's computer guy. It wasn't until last night at 11pm that I actually got my hands on it. He was ready to go on vacation for the weekend without making sure I had my hands on it. He has been waiting for a part for so long and he finally gets it and then doesn't make sure I get it when he knows he is going away. I was not impressed. If that drama wasn't enough today we had plans to go to the children's museum which is about a 2 hour drive from here but it was pouring rain so bad that it simply wasn't safe to drive out there. I was so disappointed. It seems silly but I was looking forward to it all summer, probably more so than the kids.

I know something is wrong because I have lost my appetite today and when i get upset I usually want to eat more. Today I just really don't feel like eating. I hope I can adjust to my new life routine quickly because ready or not...here it comes.

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Day 51 of 730 (Slacking)

This week is our family staycation. We've been pretty busy with uncertain schedules and I just haven't been working out like I should. I will be out most of the day today again and having my kids friend over for the night with a short road trip for all of tomorrow. I think I am accepting this week for what it is...a vacation.

Saturday, Sunday and Monday I will work out, plus as much as possible next week. I will build my new routine right away when school starts as not to have any bad habits forming.

I am very much looking forward to a successful month ahead with all of you by my side :)

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Day 50 of 730 (Weigh In Day)

I am 50 days into my journey to a slimmer me. I've made some great changes and have stuck to my plan to work out and not attempt weight loss on diet alone. After today's weigh in I feel that I am learning the balance between eating and living well and indulging in some treats now and then. I am learning that a bad day or a bad choice does not equal failure.

Today I weighed in and I lost 4.9 lbs in August and 9.2 lbs in total. This is about 1.5 lbs per week. Am I happy? YES!!! If that wasn't enough excitement for one day, I also took my measurements today. I am not sure the correct way to report inches lost but I am down an inch all over except I am down TWO inches in my waist.

As I look forward to September I see a very busy month ahead as I adjust to college life. However I am confident that I can achieve all my dreams if I just make them important enough. Thank you to everyone for your positivity and encouragement. Today is such a very happy day for me :)

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Day 48 & 49 (Tomorrow is The Day)

Not only is tomorrow the 50th day, it is also September 1st. Tomorrow I will weigh in and share my results with you. I will also take my measurements and let you know if there are any inches lost. I am pretty excited for tomorrow.

It's been hard to stay on track with the family home and running all over town doing different things. It disrupts my eating and exercise schedule and as much as I try to plan ahead it's not always perfect. On the plus side, I am doing many things I never would have done in the past. For example we went to the zoo yesterday and I packed my lunch and tons of water. I did not have a beaver tail or eat and junk (like fries or pizza).

I have to get upstairs now and get a work out in before we run the roads again today. We are taking the kids on a play date to a local splash pad to play for the afternoon. Be sure to check in tomorrow when I Post my results thus far.

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Day 47 of 730 (Check In)

I slept in today because my loving husband thought I'd rather sleep than wake up. In reality I wanted to wake up because I knew I needed to work out today before work. I have just polished off my coffee and some toast with light cream cheese, followed by a tall glass of ice water. I am taking a moment to check in here to say that as much as I no longer want to work out before work, I will. I will because I didn't yesterday and I know I cannot tomorrow. I know I will not do it later today because I work until 8:30 tonight. So I am pushing myself right now to go get a quick workout in. Tomorrow I will be at the zoo all day so I am not sure if I will blog or not.

Saturday, August 28, 2010

Day 46 of 730 (My Prize)

I am not sure if you heard of Under Way products but I won a prize pack of all kinds of goodies from this diet; muffins, cookies, cereal, soup, shakes and vitamin water to name a few.

I will not follow the diet they lay out because the first thing that caught my eye on the pamphlet was that you cannot eat fruit. Any diet that says you cannot eat real food doesn't sound healthy to me. I will try these snacks though and see how they are. I haven't tried them yet because I am saving them for some back to school snacks and as a grab and go breakfast option.

I'd like to thank Deborah from Raising My Boys for the ooprtunity to sample so many products that might help me in my weight loss efforts. I will let you know which ones I like.

Friday, August 27, 2010

Day 45 of 730 (Easier Said Than Done)

It is so easy to say things than to actually do them isn't it? I tell myself a million times that this is a slow process and no matter what I do it will always be a slow process. I know in my heart this is true. I know only dedication, hard work and self control will lead me to success eventually. Yet I still feel frustrated by the fact that it will be slow.

It is getting harder to stay motivated and it is not because I'm not weighing myself often. In fact seeing small numbers up and down on a scale would be worse (been there done that). My weigh in and measuring day is coming up soon but I don't feel much different than when I started. My clothes seem to be fitting the same still and no one can notice anything yet. I am more nervous to check in with my scale and my measuring tape than excited.

I am hoping by Thanksgiving dinner when the family gets together someone is able to tell. I might be close to 15lbs lighter by then. If not then hopefully by Christmas dinner it will be more obvious. Until then I just have to keep going no matter how much I want to throw in the towel sometimes.

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Day 44 of 730 (Schedule)

So I finally got my college schedule, well most of it anyway. One course is still missing which will result in two added time slots. However, what I see so far is great. Most classes are in the middle of the day which means I will have extra time before school to work out most days and I will still be home for my family in the evenings. Everything is starting to come together and I am feeling more confident that I will be able to balance it all.

As soon as I know the rest of my schedule I am going to add my workouts to me schedule so I will not start a trend of procrastinating and missing workouts. Obviously there will be exceptions but I think for the most part this plan will work.
Most days I will only be packing lunch and a snack and be home for Breakfast and Dinner which is great. So far only Wednesdays I will need a grab and go breakfast.

I am very excited about this new chapter in my life and hope the next 2 years will be productive academically and physically.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Day 42 & 43 (Been Busy)

Yesterday we went to a theme park with some friends for the day. I had some chicken teriyaki for lunch which was delicious and better than pizza, fries, hot dogs etc. I didn't work out but we did walk around a lot, as you tend to do at theme parks.

Today my son has a friend over for a sleepover. I did work out today and we are heading to a play center for the afternoon. I feel back on track for the most part. This is a really short post just to check in and make sure you all know I haven't given up.

I'll be back to normal blogging tomorrow.

Monday, August 23, 2010

Day 41 of 730 (I Blew It)

What happened to yesterday? It was a terrible day for me. I ate way too much junk and didn't exercise like I planned to. I was fully aware of what I was doing too, but just wouldn't stop.

Today is a new day and I want it to be different. I want control over myself back. I am not sure what is happening lately but it's the same pattern that happens every time I try to lose weight. After about a month or so I start giving up. It's like I know it's a slow process and will take a long time to see results. In fact that is why this blog is called An Ounce a Day, to remind myself that it is going to take time to see real results. Its just so hard to live by that attitude. I just want results right now. Noticeable ones. Results that make people say "Have you lost weight"?

I guess the only way to achieve my goals is to remain slow and steady and stay focused even on the days when I feel so 'blah'. The weather isn't helping either. I haven't seen the sun since Thursday or Friday and the constant rain is really bringing me down.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Day 40 of 730 (Week In Review)

This week gave me a taste of being busy and I do not like it. It's only going to get busier and busier from here on out. Don't get me wrong, I love having things to do and shopping this week was so much fun. What I don't like about being busy is the way it takes the focus off of my exercise efforts. However I was able to get back on track immediately. I missed Monday and Wednesday's workout so I worked out Saturday and I will work out today.

This week I worked out for 25 minutes twice and for 35 minutes 3 times. My 25 minute workouts will now be saved for days when I have limited time, but mostly I will push for 35 minutes. I feel the burn in those extra 10 minutes and I cannot wait until 35 minutes starts to feel easy. I like the feeling of building endurance.

I ate fairly well most of the week with the exception of Monday night's cheese steak at the Cheese Cake Factory in Buffalo. But hey, It could have been worse, I could have actually eaten cheese cake but I resisted. Then last night we ordered in some Mr. Greek for a late dinner which I enjoyed so very much.

Some things I did not like about this week are; not drinking enough water, finding it difficult to eat breakfast again and not wanting to snack on fruit or other healthy things. I have really felt like I had to dig deep for extra will power and practically force myself to make good choices.

My goal for next week is to stay focused and continue working hard whether I like it or not.

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Day 39 of 730 (Breakfast)

First water now breakfast. Lately I just feel like I don't want any part of some things. I'd almost rather drink nothing than water and rather wait until lunch than eat breakfast. I am forcing myself through teh motions though because I know it's what I need to do to reach my goals. Similar to the reason why I am going to school. Sometimes we just have to put up with the rain to see the rainbow.

So I am sitting here eating some Kashi cereal while I type this. We picked up a few new flavours and the one I'm eating today tastes much better then the flax seed flavoured one. I try to mix up my breakfast; eggs, toast, cereal. In the winter I'll add oatmeal I'm sure. I just find it hard lately to feel like eating in the morning.

I am also looking for your on the go breakfast ideas. Once school starts there may be mornings where I just do not have time. What is your grab and go breakfast?

Friday, August 20, 2010

Day 38 of 730 (Water)

My water intake has not been great lately. I need to focus on how much water I am drinking again, especially when I am out. This week I have been out a lot compared to my usual routine and on those days I have drank little to no water. I am not feeling as good as I was when I was drinking more water everyday.

I find it difficult to bring water with me everywhere because I really prefer drinking it in a glass with ice. It's hard for me to drink water from a bottle and more so when it's extremely warm. I am hoping I can train myself to just get used to it though.

My goal of the day is to drink more water no matter what.

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Day 37 of 730 (Kick Me)

Ok I am at the fork in the road I have faced many times. I can continue strong and never look back or I can go hang out at the all you can eat buffet and sell my treadmill on kijiji. My mind is just not staying focused. I know I still want to succeed but I am starting to feel overwhelmed and school hasn't even started yet.

Yesterday I found myself back at the mall finishing up my back to school shopping and then trying to catch up with work. I still have so much to catch up on in my home and with my business before school starts. We have very busy weeks ahead and I am not liking the way my workouts are not remaining consistent like they were. I feel like I am slipping.

I want having no time to be a valid excuse but I know that it isn't a lack of time but more a lack of planning. I want to just say well this week is already all messed up so I may as well just wait until next week. That is the old unsuccessful me talking. The part of me (probably the fat cells) that do not want me to carry on down this healthy road. So instead of choosing to wait until next week to make a change I will make a change today and make sure I am back on the treadmill before lunch and then again tomorrow, Saturday and Sunday. I've checked my schedule and time does allow for me to get my workouts in all those days.

This time as I face the fork in the road I will not take the nice paved path, instead I will take the rocky road because I know that at the end of this road is a new me and I can't wait to meet her.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Day 36 of 730 (Weight Watchers)

I have been a Weight Watchers member twice and a Jenny Craig member once and only once did I lose a significant amount of weight. The first time I tried Weight Watchers was just after my first son was born. I had gained about 60lbs carrying him and had only lost about 20 of those pounds in the first few months and decided to try Weight Watchers. They were having a New Year special so I signed up for 6 months. I lost about 25lbs but couldn't afford to keep going so I stopped going. I was able to lose about 10 more lbs on my own.

I tried Jenny Craig when my second son was a year old on a friend's advice. I didn't like it at all. I didn't like eating so much frozen food and never sure if it was ok to eat real food. It was very expensive and there was little to no result and I quit that very quickly.

When my now husband and I had picked out a wedding date I thought I would try weight watchers again in an effort to lose some more weight. But this time I struggled. I didn't put my heart into it like I had the first time. Also the meetings were just not the same.

My first leader was great. Her meetings were straight to the point and she offered us recipes and personalized ideas to help us along. She spent a huge portion of her meeting talking to us, answering questions and letting us share ideas with others. My second leader spent most of her meeting selling weight watchers. We would spend the entire meeting every week listening to her compare Weight Watchers to Jenny Craig, Atkins, the cabbage soup diet and countless other 'bad ways to lose weight' diets and programs. It was always the last 10 minutes that we rushed through the material she planned aand we never got a chance to share ideas or address our struggles. I didn't lose even 10lbs this time and didn't bother going back.

I think for me the secret to weight loss success will be learning to simply make healthy choices and exercise. Writing this blog and reading other blogs to me is more beneficial than any weight watchers meeting. Writing allows me to clear my head, celebrate success and plan goals for myself. Reading your comments are like a warm hug or a kick in the butt (depending what I need that day). So from now on I will save my money and use common sense to get myself through this life long journey.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Day 34 and 35 (Missed a Day)

I missed yesterday's blog because I was up at 5:30am and not home until late at night. By then I was all shopped out and tired. I went shopping for back to school stuff in Buffalo. It was a fun and adventurous day. However I missed my workout and ate a little heavy at the restaurant for dinner. I did pack a lunch though and snacking was next to nothing all day.

I woke up today though feeling bad about my cheese steak sandwich. It was jam packed with steak, onions, peppers and mushrooms. It was on white bread. I did have a side of salad though and only drank water. However I did feel pretty guilty when I woke up. As I type this though and actually look at it, I guess it wasn't so bad.

My schedule today is a little out of whack because I slept in and I have my son home. Camp is over for him. I ended up missing breakfast because I got busy in work and just ate lunch now. I will let my stomach settle a while and then go work out. Today is a day where I am not really looking forward to my workout but I know I will feel better once it is over.

I didn't like missing my blog writing yesterday and I hope it doesn't happen too often once life does get crazy busy. Writing my blog really helps keep my mind focused.

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Day 33 of 730 (Week In Review)

Today is Sunday, my week in review day. This week I started increasing my time on the treadmill because I'm starting to feel like I am getting through the 25 minute work out a bit too easily. I did my 35minute workout 2/5 times and 25 minutes the other 3 times. The days I increased the time were tough. I look forward to mastering the 5 program modes at 35 minutes. This week I will be doing a few days at 25 minutes again, but next week it will all be 35 minutes.

I stuck with my eating fairly well this week. Last night I went to a BBQ and was very careful not to eat too much. I have 1 chicken leg, a very small serving of rice and lots of salad with no dressing. I did indulge in 3 bottles of Smirnoff ice. I know that those alcoholic drinks are not the greatest for losing weight but I only drink 2-3 times a year so what the heck. A few nights I snacked a little more than I wanted to but it was still fairly good foods.

A goal for next week is to remember to bring water with me everywhere I go.

Saturday, August 14, 2010

Day 32 of 730 (Days Off)

I hate my days off from working out. I cannot tell you how crazy I feel to say that. I hate exercise remember? But what I hate more than that is waking up feeling like I swelled up in my sleep. Lately I have been waking up feeling lighter. I have noticed the day after a non workout day I wake up feeling heavy. That would be today. I didn't work out yesterday but I will today. I won't step on the scale but I wouldn't be surprised if I gained 3 lbs last night.

I still ate well yesterday and even cooked dinner even though I had an enormous headache which I blame on not having a coffee in the morning. My headache started around 2:30 so I tried laying down for a while. It didn't help and was getting worse so I took 2 tylenol around 4:00. By 7:00 I still wasn't feeling any better so I took 2 more tylenols and went to 'sleep' for a while. Finally caved in and made some coffee around 9:00pm and then felt 100% better within minutes. This caffeine addiction is out of control.

Anyway, back to the main topic, I know we all must take a few days to rest but what can I do to continue feeling light and not so heavy? Does anyone else feel this way? Do you think it's all in my head? Do you take rest days?

Friday, August 13, 2010

Day 31 of 730 (Friday the 13th)

Today is Friday the 13th. It is a special day to me because today would have been my nana's 71st birthday. However she died 12 years ago when she was only 59 years old. She was in bad health and a lot of her health problems stemmed from being over weight such as asthma and diabetes.

Today I also had to write an assessment placement test for college. I told myself that she was with me today as I braved the very confusing campus trying to find my way around. I found my way so my theory can't be all crazy.

Whenever I have to go somewhere on a weekday I consider it out of routine so extra preparations and planning are necessary if I want to stay on track. I woke up a little bit earlier to ensure I had enough time for breakfast and made sure not to stop and buy anything from Tim Hortons or other tempting well loved places. As soon as I returned home I made myself lunch. This should sound like regular everyday things but the old me would have slept until the last minute, ate on the go for breakfast and lunch (if there was even a breakfast).

I am not working out today but will do so tomorrow.

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Day 30 of 730 (Happy Day)

Today I feel really happy. I have really stuck to my plan to change my life. It is the 30th day and there are only 700 days left for my challenge. I know it's really forever but I love counting down the days so just plat along with me.

I am looking forward to mini milestones including day 50, 100, 500 etc. It makes me feel like I am well on my way to know I am on day 30. I had to work this morning. It's rare for me to have to go to work on a weekday but I made sure to wake up a few minutes early to have breakfast first. Now I am back home and will work out after I drink some more water. These are the little changes that I've been making to ensure my success. The old me would not have eaten breakfast and definitely would not be working out.

What are some of the little changes you have made in your life? What are some of the mini milestones you have celebrated?

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Day 29 of 730 (Changes)

Since I began this journey I have tried to make some changes and some are working. The two biggest changes have been switching from white bread to whole wheat and switching from cream to milk in my coffee. I have also increased my water consumption which is a miracle in itself. I eat breakfast, lunch and dinner every day and exercise 4-5 times a week. I shop differently in the grocery store and eat differently when on the run.

And all these changes are changing me. I am sleeping better and waking up feeling rested. My skin is not so dry anymore. I've been getting a lot of compliments on my hair lately too. I smile more and I am less moody.

I know I have a long journey ahead of me but so far I have been feeling so very positive and sticking to my plan. It's getting easier to control cravings and they really are coming less and less. I find myself often reading labels and thinking "nah, it's not worth it" and choosing something healthier.

I am also so grateful to have you all helping me keep my mind on track knowing that you are fighting the same battle. It really is a subject of mind over matter and keeping our minds on track is all we really need to do. The rest will follow.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Day 28 of 730 (Planning Lunches)

As you know I am starting college this September. What you may not know is that I have been home Monday-Friday for the past 3 years. I am used to having my days to myself with my fridge and stove mere steps away. I am worried about going to school and having to pack a lunch. I haven't packed myself a lunch since grade 7. I always bought myself food. When I was pregnant with my second child I had a co-worker/friend care so much that she brought me lunch EVERY DAY. So I gave her my lunch money. I know I am spoiled.

This time I have serious goals and eating out even once a week is simply not an option. But what can I pack that is easy to eat on the go? I am looking for lots of your tried and tested great college lunch ideas. Thank you :)

Monday, August 9, 2010

Day 27 of 730 (Positivity x 3)

Today I want to work on thinking positive so I have come up with some categories and in each category I will list three positive observations. The reason I am doing this is because I want to put the good things on a pedestal and sweep the negative things under a rug.

Working Out
1. Been consistent with 5 workouts per week
2. Breathing much better and no longer cramping
3. Building stamina and ready to gradually increase time

1. Dramatic increase in fruits and vegetables consumed
2. Dramatic decrease in pre-packaged foods consumed
3. Drinking more water and less diet coke

Emotional Change
1. Wake up more alert and less tired
2. Generally more patient and happy
3. Proud of myself

Physical Change
1. Smoother skin, especially face
2. Feel slightly slimmer in random areas
3. Stronger heart and lungs

Going to College
1. Free gym membership
2. Moving more simply by leaving the house every day
3. Will be tired and have better sleeping schedule

I through in the going the college one because it's the one thing causing me the most stress right now. I do feel more positive after writing this post. I am now ready to face the week ahead.

Sunday, August 8, 2010

Day 26 of 730 (Week In Review)

Another Sunday is here! That means it is review day. This week has been very successful for me because I pushed through and worked out out everyday Monday to Friday even through my period. I ate well every meal and snacked mostly healthy. I had a few too many Areo single bars during the rougher 2 days of my cycle but I still feel good about the week.

My husband and I have cut back a little bit more on our pre-packaged foods at the grocery store and increased the amount of fresh foods we are buying. When we do choose a pre-packaged item we read and compare the labels. I have fallen in love with the Strawberry Melon and the Blueberry Raspberry FUZE drinks. I am not having too many though. I still haven't completely let go of my diet coke. I tried but I'm not ready. I have decreased dramatically though and will continue to wean myself.

This week I am going to increase 2 of 5 days of my workout time from 25 minutes to 35minutes on the treadmill. This week I found a few days where I wasn't quite tired enough when it was over. Next week I will do 3 days at 35 minutes and then the week after be 100% at 35 minutes. I would also like to work on learning how to do push ups. As of now I can do next to zero of them. I will let you know when I can do 10.

This is not weigh in day so check back on September 1st to see a weight update as well as a measurement update. For those who don't know, I weigh in once a month and measure once every two months.

Saturday, August 7, 2010

Day 25 of 730 (Old Pictures)

My whole life I have felt fat. I was never the biggest in the school but I was always the biggest in my group, in 4 different schools. I never felt good enough. I never felt comfortable wearing the same kind of clothes they would wear even though I liked them. I always wanted to wear big baggy clothes. Occasionally I would wear a tight fitting top but never tight jeans. I always had a smaller upper body and then huge thighs.

I remember how I felt about myself so vividly. So when I was looking through some old pictures yesterday and saw myself, even beside my skinny friends, I couldn't believe the first thought that came to my head, "OMG I was so thin!" I could see my collar bone sticking out, my stomach was flat and although my thighs were a bit big they offered me a nice shape and I did not look fat.

I wish I enjoyed the years my body was like that. I wish I didn't waste them thinking I wasn't good enough. I cannot wait to look like that again. In fact I think I will tape those pics all over my treadmill so I can be reminded every day how beautiful I can be if I just stick to this.

Friday, August 6, 2010

Day 24 of 730 (Going To College)

I haven't been in school for 10 years but as of September 7th I'll be back in school. I am feeling many emotions about it but mostly I'm nervous. Not only am I nervous about new routines, finding enough time in a day to balance kids, husband, school and my business, but I am very nervous about my weight loss efforts.

My routine of being at home most of the time has been wonderful. I wake up throw something on and take my son to school, come home make some coffee, check emails, facebook, twitter, write a blog or two, have more coffee...Basically I can take my time.

I anticipate waking up much earlier most days and rushing like a mad woman to get two kids to school (little one starts big school this year) and get myself to school, all without a car. I am trying to imagine in my mind getting a healthy dinner cooked, kids homework done, my homework done, booking parties for my business, working out 5 times a week, working parties all weekend, cleaning, laundry etc etc.

I am so scared that I am going to be too tired or too busy to work out. I guess I know deep down that is just up to me to make it happen but I am scared I will fail. I need to develop a plan to continue eating right and exercising enough so that I will not resort back to my old habits.

If anyone has tips that work for them I would love to hear them.

Thursday, August 5, 2010

Day 23 of 730 (That Time)

This post is really for the ladies, (Sorry guys).

So my period showed up almost a week late this month. I am assuming it's because of my new exercise routine. Now that it is here I feel so fat and bloated. I am suffering with extreme cramps (but that's nothing new). What is new is that I work out now and well, I need to know if the fact that my period is here means I should take it easy or just keep going as per usual. I naturally feel weak, hot and tired when my period is here. I cannot imagine working out today yet something inside tells me it's no excuse.

I would like some advice from my lady friends as to how you manage your weight loss efforts during your cycle. Do you eat differently or incorporate specific foods? Do you lighten your work out or skip it altogether or just continue as usual? Do you find that the weight gain during your cycle sticks or are you back to normal once aunt flo leaves?

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Day 22 of 730 (Fast Food)

Whenever I reflect on the changes I've made the past 3 weeks one always stands out the most. We haven't had take out or fast food in a long time. I'm not sure when it started but we would order something every Thursday or Friday and then usually ate fast food on the weekends....sometimes twice in one day. Now the only 2 times I've eaten fast food was for a wrap at Mr. Sub.

The most surprising thing for me is I don't miss it and I'm not craving it. I am not saying I will never eat fast food again or have an order in night once in a while, but it will be just once in a while.

When I think about dinner now, I crave 'real' food and I love that feeling. The fact that my body wants a plate full of broccoli or a bowl of salad reaffirms that I am on the road to success. It's a long road but I plan to just keep going like Forrest Gump did when he just felt like running.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Day 21 of 730 (Now it's a Habit, Right?)

They say if you do something for 21 days it will become a habit. I'm not so sure about that. I think I could very easily wake up tomorrow and give up. That is why I know today more than any day I must stick to plan and get my workout in.

I am being firm with myself this time because I know I have failed before. I once gave up chips, chocolate, ice cream etc for over 21 days and one taste of chocolate sent me on a sugar binge for weeks. This time I am not eliminating chocolate completely and so far it's working perfectly.

I never want to miss more than 2 days of working out in a row. I want to continue making it a huge part of my everyday life so that I will not binge on skipping workouts. I know it will take far more than 21 days to make a habit out of this journey...in fact it will take a whole lifetime of dedication.

Monday, August 2, 2010

Day 20 of 730 (Health vs Self Image)

I know I am supposed to look at myself in the mirror and tell myself that I need to lose weight and get in shape so that I can be in better health for myself and my children. I should want to do this so that I do not die at age 59 like my nana did due to the 101 conditions she had, some weight related and some smoking related. I should do it because I am genetically at risk of developing diabetes, heart disease, stroke and a bunch of other crap. I know this reason should surpass all other reasons and while I respect the importance of health and the need to be healthy, this reason is not at the forefront of my heart.

All I am hoping for is to fit in clothing from a normal store. To be able to zip up my jeans and not have to stuff myself into them and perhaps look great in them too. I want to want to have my picture taken. I want to feel like a normal person rather than a fat person.

I hate how vain I look putting more emphasis on appearance rather than my health but inside I have craved for this feeling for a long time. I finally feel on track to reaching my goal thanks to so many inspiring people I've found through twitter. I know the fact that my heart will be stronger and my weight will be lower and my body will be functioning more like it was designed to is by far the most important thing. But when I buy my first pair of skinny jeans, that is when I will know I have done what I set out to do.

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Day 19 of 730 (Week In Review + Weigh In)

This week I got through my husband's birthday and our first date night since being on this journey. Instead of getting a birthday cake, I baked low fat carrot muffins with icing on the side for those who wanted icing. Carrot cake and muffins are his favorite so it was win win. Yesterday we went out for dinner and I enjoyed the menu and my meal. I felt like pasta with white sauce and mushrooms and that is what I had. We shared a piece of chocolate brownie cheesecake and I enjoyed that too. I did choose to drink only water though. When we went to the movie theatre afterwards I didn't have any popcorn. Instead, I packed a kitkat single bar in my purse.

The rest of the week was great. I ate 3 meals a day, snacked much less most days and have been more aware of protein in my meals. I have been drinking a glass of water to ensure I really am hungry before snacking. I realized that sometimes I am just thirsty.

I worked out 4 times this week and MUST workout again today at some point. I missed Wednesday due to my husband's birthday celebrations and promised to make it up one day this weekend. I dislike the workout itself but I LOVE the feeling afterwards. I feel so accomplished once I'm finished and showered. My plan was to start increasing the time on the treadmill this week but I have decided to take things slow. I am still finding 25 minutes difficult to get through and I am still nervous to push too much. I have a fear of fainting as I have fainted occasionally throughout my childhood due to excessive exercise or suddenly feeling too hot. Fainting is what turned me off of exercise at the age of 6.

Anyway, today is August, 1st and that means it is weigh in day. It's been 19 days so far and I am excited to see how I am doing. (I probably shouldn't have ate such a heavy meal last night) But, I am happy to say I have lost 4.3lbs. I am going to update inches every 2 months so you can read about that with my next weigh in on September 1st.

Saturday, July 31, 2010

Day 18 of 730 (Swimming)

When I was a kid I practically lived in the water. My mom lived with my grandmother in an apartment and they had an outdoor pool. I would spend almost my whole summer in the pool from the minute it opened until the minute it closed. I had an awesome tan.

As I grew up I would swim every chance I could up until about 13 or 14 years old when I realized I didn't quite have a bathing suit body. All of a sudden I was avoiding the water as much as possible.

As an adult I can probably count on my hand how many times I've gone swimming. It's generally when I am on vacation and feel like I will not see anyone I know. Although funny enough, last year in Cuba I bumped into my best friend's sister at the resort. I recently braved the water park at Canada's Wonderland for the first time since it opened. I loved it. Granted I had shorts on over my bathing suit but I did it.

Today I am taking my kids swimming with my husband. My 4 year old son needs some exposure to the pool before he starts his swimming lessons in September. I am learning to not let my insecurities punish my kids and also to accept myself for who I am.

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Day 17 of 730 (Perfectionist)

I have been monitoring my weight loss trends in my life a lot lately. What worked in the past and what did not? Why didn't certain things work? What made me give up? How can I change these areas to produce positive results? These are some of the questions I've been reflecting on.

What I realize the most is I give up rather easily if I get off track, have a bad day or week or if it's just plain too hard. I give up if I feel like all my sacrifices and hard work are for nothing (a.k.a. a disappointing number on the scale).

I am not sure why I have this perfectionist mind state when it comes to my weight loss because I would never think someone else failed or should give up if they had a bad day, week or month. I find I come down really hard on myself if I 'mess up' and I need to address this issue and learn to accept the fact that I am only human.

I am at about the same stage where the risk of quitting is at it's highest, as history shows, so I need to be aware of my feelings more and remain strong, positive and moving forward no matter what.

How do you deal with your bad days? How do you let go and move forward without giving up?

Day 16 of 730 (New Scale)

My old scale is, well, old. It's not digital and the screen seems discoloured slightly. It is very hard to tell exactly what line it's pointing too. I have hated my scale for a few years now, and not just for the number it was showing me either. So last night I finally bought a new scale. I got a weight watchers glass one and it is so sexy.

Since I am not weighing in until August 1st I had my kids test it out for me. They liked being able to see how much they weigh without me having to tell them. They can easily read the scale themselves. I can't wait to test out all the features it has such as Body Fat, BMI, Body Water and Bone Mass. Not that I really need to know all of that. I like that is has a 10 user memory so it will always know me.

I am super excited to weigh in on Sunday. Stay tuned for my results :)

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Day 15 of 730 (Your Mom Is Fat)

Well it happend. My biggest fear came true. Ok, maybe not my BIGGEST fear, but it's definitely up there. Yesterday I walked over to pick my son up from camp at 4:00 like I have everyday for the past 3 weeks and when he saw me he ran across the park backpack in hand tears streaming down his face.

"Someone said you are fat, but you're not fat you're beautiful mommy." He said as he hugged me ever so tightly. "When they said that about you I was heartbroken" he added.

It took every ounce of energy I had to not burst into tears myself, as I did not want to make him feel that this was a big deal or that the words of some 7 year old kid could really hurt me, or that they should upset him. I wiped his face and told him that if he thinks I am beautiful that is all that matters and that we don't care about that boy's opinion. He cheered up a little and we changed the subject for the walk home.

My mind however was thinking back to a time when my son was born and I remember saying to myself that I hope my kids are never teased because of their fat mom. (True story). I have to admit it hurts a lot to have a kid tell you that you are fat because kids are usually brutally honest, but having your own son tell you that you are beautiful definity outweighs the fat comment.

I have to say that my 6 year old son is always full of the best compliments and I love him to pieces for loving me just the way I am. He sees so deep into who I am on the inside that he doesn't even notice that the camp kid is actually right, I am fat.

I feel terrible that my son's heart was broken because I let my weight get out of control. I hope one day to be a skinny in shape mom so kids won't be able to hurt him ever again.

Day 14 of 730 (The Hangover)

I feel like I have a hangover this morning but I didn't even have anything to drink last night. What I did do last night was over indulge. I finished up my dinner at 5:30pm but didn't go to sleep until 1:30am. During that time I managed to eat popcorn, areo single bar, a mango, frozen yogurt and toast with cheese. Please don't judge me. It is very hard for me to share my failure but I did say from day 1 that i would share the good and the bad and be honest either way.

I regret it today and I am not really sure why I let myself snack so much. I do think it could be because my period should be coming soon. Sorry for too much information, but it's a given that this time of the month offers it's own set of challenges.

I am not letting last night's slip up break me down though. Instead I am leaving it in the past and moving on with today. I already made myself eat some cereal for breakfast and have planned my meals for the day. I will still do my workout as usual. Tonight I will be out of the house for part of the evening so that will help me control any further cravings.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Day 13 of 730 (Keeping A Journal)

I used to be a member of weight watchers. I started there sometime after my first son was born in 2003. I lost about 25lbs with them in about 6 months. Once my membership expired though I couldn't afford to continue going. I did well on my own until I got pregnant again in 2005. After that pregnancy I tried Jenny Craig and failed, so I went back to weight watchers. I didn't lose much at all this time around so I quit going there too. (those places are expensive)

The one thing i did learn from weight watchers though, is the importance of knowing what you are eating each day and each week. That is why food journals are such a big emphasis in their program. I have always been bad about journals, especially with having to also find the point values and add or subtract them etc. Since I am not counting points this time and am only trying to make better choices I have decided to start a food journal. My sister was kinda enough to share some journal logs she had. There are 3 sheets; one for food, one for cardio and one for other workout routines (lifting weights etc). I am not sure if I will track all of those yet but today I will start a food journal.

I am hoping that by keeping a journal again I will be more aware of what I am eating and when I am eating it. I think it will help make sure I am having 3 meals a day and balanced snacks. It also has a section to track water intake and I know that will be beneficial to me as well.

Do you journal your food intake? Do you find it helps you stay on track?

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Day 12 of 730 (Weekly Reflection)

Well today is Sunday and it is time to reflect on this past week. I am so very proud of myself this week for what I have accomplished. I have broke a personal record this week with my workout routine.

In my lifetime I have never stuck with a workout this much before and I feel so accomplished already. This week I worked out for 6 days in a row, surpassing my goal of 5 days. It wasn't easy and I am feeling it but I will not slow down just yet. My goal for this coming week is 5 days. The best days for me to work out are Monday-Friday so I am trying to look at it as part of my job...something I just have to do.

I cannot say that I am enjoying my work outs but it's not terrible and I am sure I can get used to it if I keep it a part of a strict routine. Just before a workout I take about 30minutes to get myself psyched up for it. Once I begin I try to get lost in the music that I'm certain the whole neighbourhood can hear. When I complete my workout I still find myself slightly light headed so I sit for a few minutes in a meditation like state and try to breathe through it before I take a shower. Once my shower is complete I feel really good and motivated to eat well because of the hard work I just put in.

My eating habits have changed and I am back to being aware of what I am eating, portion sizes and checking for calories, fat, fibre and sugar. I have had a few treats as well such as an areo single chocolate bar to curb a craving before a binge occurs. I've managed to stay away from all other junk around here simply by treating myself to the single size chocolate bar. I'm back to eating smart pop popcorn when I feel snacky late at night. But the biggest accomplishment this week eating wise has actually been with my water intake. I am surprised at how much water I have consumed and even more surprised that my 12 pack of diet coke is still not finished. I used to go through almost 2 cases a week.

I am very excited for next Sunday as that is the 1st of the month and my weigh in day. For those who missed it, I am weighing in only the 1st of each month as I do not want the scale to make me feel disappointed like it has in the past. I will share with you all the pounds and inches lost or gained (if any) so be sure to check back with me on August 1st.

Saturday, July 24, 2010

Day 11 of 730 (Feeling The Pain And The Gain)

My body hurts. Specifically, the top of my thighs and my upper arms and parts of my back muscles are feeling the burn from this weeks workout. I can only imagine how shocked my body is with what it's been through this week. Afterall, I haven't exercised in months, or maybe not in over a year, but who's counting.

But you know what? I feel great. Through all the pain I can feel the gaain too. The real back pain I always felt feels so much better. I feel so much more flexible already. It's like I've loosened up.

This weekend is one of rest from my workout but I am pumped for my workout on Monday. My plan next week is to work out each day Monday to Friday. I will still be doing my 25 minute treadmill routine plus light weights and other exercises.

Friday, July 23, 2010

Day 10 of 730 (Small Victories)

Yesterday marked the 5th day on a row I did a workout routine. Today will make 6 consecutive days of working out. This is a very big deal for me because my body has never in all it's 28 years worked out that many times in a row. I feel so good about this accomplishment. I didn't quit. I didn't cheat. I just did the work and now I just want to keep going.

I will not be working out this weekend as I have quite a few parties to attend (for work). It's going to be a challenging weekend because my schedule is very messy and I will be rushing around from city to city which often leads to fast food. I'm thinking I will pack my own lunch on Saturday and then we'll have subway for dinner. I will pack snacks to avoid bad choices throughout the day. Sunday it not as bad and all I need again is to pack a few snacks.

I am feeling very pumped about this whole routine and anxious to weigh in on the first of the month. I want nothing more than to make changes that I will stick with and be successful with.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Day 9 of 730 (Making It Fun)

It's been 9 days thus far on my personal journey to lose this weight once and for all. It feels so much longer though. I am already feeling changes within my self. I am tired earlier, I wake up more refreshed and STARVING! Breakfast is becoming something my body asks for and waiting until lunch to eat is becoming a thing of the past.

I have found a wonderful group to share this blog with to support me and make me feel less alone in my mission. I appreciate everyone so very much for reading, commenting and tweeting with me. The benefits of a support system like this are priceless.

However I realize this is only the beginning and continuing to do well will take a lot of commitment and hard work. As someone who does not enjoy exercising at all I can easily see myself growing bored with the whole routine and giving up as history shows this to be true. However I started this journey telling myself I know why I fail so lets address each issue early and not let failure be an option.

Conclusion: I need to make this fun. I was thinking about maybe trying a yoga class or Pilates or perhaps start going swimming again. I also wanted to either get a wii fit or kinect shape for xbox. These things wouldn't replace my daily workout routine but instead add to it and keep things fresh and new and not always about getting on the treadmill.

I would love to hear ideas about how you keep things fun in your exercise routine or classes you have tried.

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Day 8 of 730 (New Inspiration)

Last night I was looking for people to follow on twitter who might be trying to lose weight. I started with a general search "trying to lose weight" and between the multiple spammers in the search feed were some real people who were in fact trying to lose weight. I followed them all. Then I saw that some tweets had the hashtag #fitblog and I thought they must be people who write blogs on weight loss. I changed my search to "#fitblog" and followed everyone I could find. Turns out they were just ending their twitter party which was all about sharing weight loss information etc. I quickly followed everyone I could find. I think I followed at least 50 new people. I hope to be apart of the twitter party next time.

Some of those people did in fact have blogs (beautiful ones I might add) and they were jammed packed with information. I also found some women who are right in the middle or near the end of their weight loss goals. Some even posted pictures of their progress.

Taking pictures had never even crossed my mind until last night. Looking at the miraculous transformations left me in awe. These are real women with real before and after pictures and they look amazing. I decided that today will be picture day and I will then take one picture each month in the same outfit for my records. When I am ready someday, I will share them with you all, but right now I will keep them for my eyes only.

Say Cheese!

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Day 7 of 730 (Groceries)

Last night we went grocery shopping for the first time since I decided to start this blog and this mission. I remembered to not shop hungry and have a list with me. However my list only had a few items on it. I wasn't sure what else to write. If we wouldn't be snacking on things like chips, cookies or ice cream, what would we be snacking on instead? I needed to look around and see all the options we always over look.

The goal was to buy more items around the perimeter of the store and less from the aisles. This makes sense as all the processed foods are kept in the aisles and the fresh stuff encircles the store.

A few changes I had planned were whole grain bread instead of white (yes I still haven't let go of my white bread all these years) and milk in my coffee instead of cream. Hubby agreed to join me in my bread selection, but isn't ready to give up his coffee cream. We didn't buy any chips, cookies, or ice cream...for the kids or us. We actually didn't buy many of the snacks the kids usually get. It's not that I am trying to put them on a diet along with me, it's that my will power is not quite there yet and I need to remove some temptation, as selfish as that may be.

We bought a lot of fruits and veggies, boneless skinless chicken breasts and extra lean ground beef. None of which are new to our list. We didn't eat all bad ya know. In fact I realized just how many good choices we already make in our day to day lives. The real issue is snacking choices, portion sizes and a few small changes to everyday foods.

I am on a mission to try one new recipe each week to keep from getting bored. This week we are trying this lemon basil chicken recipe that I stumbled upon. It sounds and looks delicious.

If you have any ideas of things I should add to my list for next week please leave me a comment.

Monday, July 19, 2010

Day 6 of 730 (Why Now?)

No one asks out loud but I am sure the question is there...why now? Why are you all of a sudden trying to lose weight? It's not the first of the year so it can't be a new year's resolution or anything. Well, one thing I've learned is that waiting for a magical day before you start something wastes a lot of valuable time. The moment your mind is right is the exact moment you have to act upon that good energy.

My weight is on my mind at least 100 times a day. I think about it the minute I wake up, when I take a shower, when I'm getting dressed, every time I eat something, every time my husband touches me, when my kids ask me if there is a baby in my tummy, when I catch friends looking at me in disgust, every time I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror or in a photograph and when I am laying down to go to sleep. I have come to realize too, that my life revolves around my weight. For example, I avoid swimming even though I love it. It really is rather depressing to not love yourself or your life the way it is. As I said in a previous post, I have tried to battle this many times throughout my life and failed and the more I fail the more hopeless I feel.

So why am I setting myself up to fail again? Why bother trying? Well, my new motivation comes from my decision to go back to school. I haven't been in school for 10 years. I will be in a classroom full of under 21 year old girls and not only will be I be the 'old' one I'll also be the 'fat' one. The thought of it makes me so nervous I feel sick to my stomach if I think about it too long. But that is why I am doing this. I am tired of avoiding situations because I am uncomfortable in my own skin. And I realize I will still be the old fat one on the first day of school no matter what, but maybe I'll be a new person in time for graduation.

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Day 5 of 730 (Week in Review)

I decided that each week Sunday's blog will be a reflection of the past week. Did I stick with my workout? Did I make good food choices? How do I feel etc. So that said, lets get to it.

Number of workouts this week: 4
Workout length: 25minutes cardio + weights, crunches etc.

This week I stuck with my goal of 4 workouts and for that I feel great. During the workouts themselves I have been able to control my dizziness but have found I start cramping mid workout even though I eat hours before working out.

My eating habits haven't completely changed and I know part of that is because we need to go grocery shopping still for my new menu. However with what we do have I have tried to eat smaller portions and snack less often. For a first week I think I did ok, but this area has a long way to go.

My hubby has agreed to make some changes with me and he wants to eat healthier too. This will help me so much because it removes temptation when he is eating some of my favourite things that I 'can't' have.

I have decided to weigh in once a month so you can look for a pounds lost update the first of each month.

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Day 4 of 730 (No Thank You)

No thank you. Three little words that are sometimes hard to say. My job requires a lot of self restraint and mustering up those three little words over and over again. As the owner of a party entertainment company I often find myself at 3-4 parties a day both Saturday and Sunday. And at almost all of them the number one thing I am offered is a piece of cake. If you read my day 2 post you know how much I love sweets, so saying no takes a lot of will power, but I do say 'no thank you' every time.

Sometimes though people take it very personal and seem to think I am rude. I'm really not trying to be rude, but really, if I had just a small piece of cake at even 1/2 the parties I attend I would eat almost a whole cake every month. It's just too much.

Sometimes we are also offered a plate of food before we go and again I usually say no. It does look and smell delicious but I did just eat before I came to your party so no thank you.

I love my clients and I love that they are sweet enough to offer, but please don't push and don't be offended if I say no. It's nothing personal, I am just really trying to watch what I eat.

As I head out this afternoon to do my rounds of parties I will be strong and not fall into temptation like I did last night...again. No one said this lifestyle change would be easy.

Friday, July 16, 2010

Day 3 of 730 (Water vs Everything else)

I have never been a huge water drinker. I grew up drinking a lot of juice and pop. I am happy to report that I hardly ever drink juice anymore and the only pop I drink now is diet coke.

My drinking habits are horrible though and need to be fixed immediately. A typical day for me consists of 2 extra large coffees in the morning over the course of about an hour and a half, 3-4 diet cokes (sometimes more) and possibly 1-2 glasses of water. I am fully aware that the coffee and the diet coke are more dehydrating than hydrating yet I still reach for them every time. In fact, if i miss my morning coffee I will suffer with a horrible headache all day.

So I am trying to make some changes to my drinking habits over the course of the next few weeks. I have tried doing this cold turkey before and failed so this time I will take a more gradual approach.

Today I started my day with breakfast before even taking a sip of my coffee. Usually I don't even eat breakfast at all. The result? I cannot even finish my first cup, yet I feel well caffeinated. I am conveniently out of diet coke at the moment so today will be a water day. I would promise to never buy diet coke again but I know I will either drink juice in its place or eat more. So Instead I plan to have a 2 cans a day limit and a 3 glasses of water a day minimum. I will work on increasing the number of glasses of water over the next few weeks as well.

P.S. I've tried flavouring my water but I don't really like them.

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Day 2 of 730 (sweet tooth)

Today is a day of confessions. Hi, my name is Angela and I am a sugar-a-holic. It's true, ever since I can remember I have been addicted to sugar. Maybe it's because my mom would practically force me to buy 2 or 3 sugarary things at the convenience store every time she stopped in to by cigarrettes or maybe my step mother's amazing cheese cakes, pies and cookies are to blame. Either way I am fairly convinced that I have a real problem.

I was reading about sugar addictions recently and I thought wow, this is exactly like me. The article in question offered no advice on rehab however. So I have tried to be more aware and tried to cut back but so far I am not overly proud of my success. Sweets of every kind will be my biggest battle during the course of my journey to a slimmer, healthier me.

I did well yesterday until about 8pm when I caved in and had an ice cream cone and later still, snuck 2 double chocolate cookies. This wasn't a complete fail though as the ice cream in the cone was at least 1/2 of what I would usually serve and 2 cookies is better than the regular 4 I would have taken. (they were the small soft chips ahoy ones, not the huge Tim Hortons kind)

I do regret it when I think back to my work out yesterday. I worked out until I was dizzy and now it feels like it was all for nothing. Today I will miss my workout. I worked out the past 3 days and I will work out again tomorrow.

If you have tips for overcoming a serious sugar addiction please leave me a comment about it.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Day 1 of 730 (Intro)

Welcome to my weight loss diary. I will update this blog daily for the next 2 years. Why 2 years you ask? Well because one thing I have heard over and over again is that real weight loss happens slowly. It's taken me 8 years to put the weight on so expecting it to come off quickly is unrealistic if I want it to stay off.

My goal is to lose 80lbs eventually. My ounce a day theory means this would take 4 years and it very well might but if I hit 45lbs in 2 years at least that is 45lbs gone forever.

I will tell you that I am not the health buff type. I am out of shape, I hate exercise and my eating habits are embarrasing. I am a complete novice at losing weight and am not sure if I will ever reach my goal. I do hope that you will follow me on my journey anyway. I will share with you all my successes and failures and be honest with you either way.

But for now I am going to walk on my tredmill for 25 minutes. This is the 3rd day in a row I have done this. The first day I did it DH laughed in my face when I told him. Who can blame him when he's watched me fail so many times before.